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D I R T Y S K Y D U B

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Google Buys Dubai [Jan. 4th, 2009|04:12 pm]
D I R T Y S K Y D U B
Sure, it starts with a few offshore data havens, it always does.

Then comes Google Intelligence, Google Currency, the Artificial Google Archipelago (8 miles off the coast of دبيّ, or Dubaīy, or Dubai), the Google Navy.

Google then changes its name to DeepLight Intel.

Google/DeepLight then buys Dubai.

Google/DeepLight then deploys the Google Low-Orbit Full Scale Nuclear Exchange Security Array, decides it wants the American continent. “Needs more server space”, naturally.

Google/DeepLight’s titanic Information Sovereignty Defense Automated Weapons Platforms (aka “The Google Manifest Destiny Project”) then emerge from their ocean floor hideaway, all barnacle-covered legs, behemoth ordnance and big as a mountain range, secretly built years earlier in the deepest parts of the Mariana Trench, by a team of autistic nano-enhanced dolphin architects wearing Google environmental protection/manipulation exoskeletal suits.

The Eastern Seaboard of the United States falls after a few hours of Google bombardment, President Palin surrendering to Google/DeepLight shortly thereafter, Canada following suit.

Google/DeepLight then, deep in the Yukon Territory, begins construction of the “Google Bridge to the Sun”. No one is quite sure what this is yet, but all agree that it is Green.

Sure, laugh it up. While you can.


(origially posted here)
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